Post by dungeonmaster on Aug 31, 2024 17:17:51 GMT
Ten of today's starting XI signed by Simpson, since the Piataks took charge of the club. Welcome to the future.
(Ratings out of 10)
Lewis - 2 - Ever dropped a bar of soap in the shower? Then you know how Lewis feels. Maybe drink ten shots of espresso and lock yourself in a coffin full of randy frogs for full effect. Seems to be having a lovely time waving at the ball as it flies into the net.
Davies - 2 - He scored! A tidy finish, but the rest of his game, average at best. Use of the ball atrocious, crossing terrible and defensively all at sea.
Williams - 1 - Struggled with and without the ball, was a free agent and it's become pretty clear very quickly why this was the case. A massive downgrade on Armer. Panic and hoof merchant.
Hayden - 1 - Go on Aaron shot from 45 yards, why not? What else could you possibly do with the ball? Perhaps he was concussed, but what was the difference? Looks leggy and lethargic, on his heels defensively. Better than Lavelle, but then again who isn't?
Thomas - 2 - At least he tried to pass the ball a few times, with extremely limited success. Should be an unstoppable force from dead balls but is all a bit limp hamster in the opposition penalty area. Maybe his excuse it's taking him time to settle, but he looks as uncertain as I feel.
Mellish - 1 - We should've sold him this summer while someone was stupid enough to pay for him. Yes he has a big heart, but technical ability and football intelligence is sadly AWOL. A good coach might be able to teach him to think but on this form - utter garbage.
Neal - 0 - Too slow to be a professional footballer. Seeing him trying to keep up with Tranmere's players was both excruciating and highly embarrassing. He still gets a shirt every week come what may and is symptom of the malaise infesting our football club.
Vela 1 - Hugely disappointing. Looks chubby and was largely behind the game. It doesn't help him playing "alongside" Neal, but as someone who has played in all four divisions his influence is entirely absent. Prime Vela would be fighting like f*ck, tackles flying in etc. This version has given up.
Jones - 3 - Some bright touches, some decent crossing, faded out of the game second half but played out of position. He's clearly a winger and doesn't have the core strength to play as an attacking midfielder or a "10". Simpson needs to change our formation and play 4-3-3 or 4-4-2 to accommodate our star signing.
Wyke - 0 - Lazy, disinterested, a waste of a shirt. Given what we're paying him, what has he given back? When your "captain" can't be arsed, it says it all.
Adu-Adjei - 4 - Great touch to assist the goal and caused problems, but was all too often trying to do everything by himself and he desperately needs support / a genuine forward alongside him. If only we had two or three more Adu-Adjei's in the squad.
Subs
Sadi - A few nice touches, but looked very young.
Barclay - He's not Lavelle, thank goodness.
Ellis - Bit of fight earned a booking
Armstrong - Effort but no composure
Star Man: Omari Patrick - thanks "Simmo", imagine if you weren't the architect of your own downfall. Patrick should still be a Carlisle player. It's obvious now where Simpson should be.
(Ratings out of 10)
Lewis - 2 - Ever dropped a bar of soap in the shower? Then you know how Lewis feels. Maybe drink ten shots of espresso and lock yourself in a coffin full of randy frogs for full effect. Seems to be having a lovely time waving at the ball as it flies into the net.
Davies - 2 - He scored! A tidy finish, but the rest of his game, average at best. Use of the ball atrocious, crossing terrible and defensively all at sea.
Williams - 1 - Struggled with and without the ball, was a free agent and it's become pretty clear very quickly why this was the case. A massive downgrade on Armer. Panic and hoof merchant.
Hayden - 1 - Go on Aaron shot from 45 yards, why not? What else could you possibly do with the ball? Perhaps he was concussed, but what was the difference? Looks leggy and lethargic, on his heels defensively. Better than Lavelle, but then again who isn't?
Thomas - 2 - At least he tried to pass the ball a few times, with extremely limited success. Should be an unstoppable force from dead balls but is all a bit limp hamster in the opposition penalty area. Maybe his excuse it's taking him time to settle, but he looks as uncertain as I feel.
Mellish - 1 - We should've sold him this summer while someone was stupid enough to pay for him. Yes he has a big heart, but technical ability and football intelligence is sadly AWOL. A good coach might be able to teach him to think but on this form - utter garbage.
Neal - 0 - Too slow to be a professional footballer. Seeing him trying to keep up with Tranmere's players was both excruciating and highly embarrassing. He still gets a shirt every week come what may and is symptom of the malaise infesting our football club.
Vela 1 - Hugely disappointing. Looks chubby and was largely behind the game. It doesn't help him playing "alongside" Neal, but as someone who has played in all four divisions his influence is entirely absent. Prime Vela would be fighting like f*ck, tackles flying in etc. This version has given up.
Jones - 3 - Some bright touches, some decent crossing, faded out of the game second half but played out of position. He's clearly a winger and doesn't have the core strength to play as an attacking midfielder or a "10". Simpson needs to change our formation and play 4-3-3 or 4-4-2 to accommodate our star signing.
Wyke - 0 - Lazy, disinterested, a waste of a shirt. Given what we're paying him, what has he given back? When your "captain" can't be arsed, it says it all.
Adu-Adjei - 4 - Great touch to assist the goal and caused problems, but was all too often trying to do everything by himself and he desperately needs support / a genuine forward alongside him. If only we had two or three more Adu-Adjei's in the squad.
Subs
Sadi - A few nice touches, but looked very young.
Barclay - He's not Lavelle, thank goodness.
Ellis - Bit of fight earned a booking
Armstrong - Effort but no composure
Star Man: Omari Patrick - thanks "Simmo", imagine if you weren't the architect of your own downfall. Patrick should still be a Carlisle player. It's obvious now where Simpson should be.